Happy English Club 電子報 本報由Host Master Team編審
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論壇 http://www.happyforum.org/happy/ 歡迎至論壇討論
Time：第139例會， 2011年10月15 (週六）下午2:30~5:30
Place：蘇格貓底咖啡屋, 清華大學校園內
viewtopic.php?t=15
Agenda
14:30~15:30 Free Talk / Topic Discussion
15:30~15:50 Speaker Session
15:50~16:00 Change Group and then Break Time
16:00~17:15 Topic Discussion
17:15~17:30 Happy Time
Host: Please volunteer
Assistant Host:
Ice Breakers:
Please introduce yourself to your group.
What do you do for a living? What do you do for fun?
How did you learn about Happy English Club?
What current events have you noticed recently?
What good movies or concerts have you enjoyed lately?
How did you spend your holidays? Was it hard to readjust after the break?
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Topic Discussion Article: The Power of an Apology (文章)
Source: October, 2007; Advanced 彭蒙惠英語; P20~P21
Have you hurt anyone’s feelings lately? Maybe you yelled at someone- but, you say, he really deserved it. Did you remember to go back and apologize later? An apology can keep your hurtful remarks from “bleeding” onto a lot of other people.
For example, a man we’ll call Tom recently told us, “My boss slammed my ego a year ago, and I haven’t gotten over it yet. He has never acted the least bit sorry or tried to smooth things over, even though I have correct all of the problems in my department. ”
When we hurt someone, we need to go back and activity, openly apologize. Otherwise, the person we’ve hurt can pass those emotions on to others. Hurt usually causes ripple effects that keep the “poison” moving on.
Removing the Hurts
“I see clients all of the time who have bruised egos,” says a psychologist friend of ours. We’ll call her Kim. “Some of these individuals are hurting from hateful remarks heard twenty years ago!” she says. “The people who hurt them probably thought the remarks would fizzle. They don’t”
Kim says that hateful words are like painful briars we’ve planted under the skins of other people. “The one who plants the briars must remove them,” she says. “A good old-fashioned apology can work wonders. It doesn’t have to be fancy or wordy. A few simple words, backed up with feeling, will do.”
A woman we’ll call Kelly phoned our office the other day. Kelly is an emergency medical service (EMS) worker. “I just worked a horrible call,” Kelly explained. “A man in my town killed his boss. Then this man drove down the street and plowed his car into a big truck- killing himself.” Kelly believes a quarrel had been brewing between the two for over a year. Neither would apologize nor try to de-escalate the tension, according to their coworkers.
Learning to apologize first
“I’ve learned to apologize to my students when I lose my temper,” says a teacher we’ll call Bob. “These kids are upset with family problems, divorced parents and pressures from every turn.” Bob says he encourages his students to share their feelings- right in his math class. “I say to my students, ‘If you’ve argued with your parents, let them know you’re sorry. If you’ve argued with your girlfriend or boyfriend, make it right before the day is over.’”
Apologizing takes real maturity. In fact, those who cannot or will not apologize are not truly mature people. A mature individual is one who can see the problem from all sides- with a decent measure of clarity.
Furthermore, a mature person is one who knows when another person is too immature to offer an apology. So the brighter human extends the hand of apology first. If you’ve quarreled with someone, extend an apology or act of kindness first. Why? When you apologize, you send negative energy and feelings away from yourself. The sooner you do this, the better for all.
Creating positive change
“I decided to apologize to a neighbor who was anger with me,” says a man we’ll call Jack. “Believe me,” says Jack, “I didn’t feel good about the things my neighbor said to me. However, I felt sure he would take his frustrations out on his wife and children. I didn’t want that.”
Jack continues, “My neighbor softened up when I extended a hand of friendship. I do occasionally stroll over to his place to say hello, because I sense there’s tension in that family. Men need to talk with other men- and it’s high time we opened up with each other.”
Jack is intelligent enough to look beyond quarrels and craziness. He’s using human kindness as leverage for positive change. We wish there were more men like Jack.
Vocabulary:
1.ego: 自尊心
2.ripple effect: 滾雪球效應
3.briar:荊棘 plow into: 強行闖入
4.brew: 即將發生(通常指不好的事情)
5.leverage: 影響力
Questions for Discussion:
Session1
Q1.Have you ever done something that made other upset? If so, did you apologize to them? What’s your feeling before and after you apologize to them?
Q2.If someone offends you but doesn’t apologize to you after that, what’s your feeling and what would you do with it?
Q3.Sometimes people are forced to apologize (ex: entertainers or politicians said something ridiculous in public, and people asked them to say sorry). Even they do it, do you think they really introspect about what they did?
Session2
Q4.Sometimes even A apologizes to B, but B cannot forget it. Why it happens? Is there any method to solve it?
Q5. Forgiveness is as important as apology. When your friend apologizes to you, how you manage your relationship?
Q6. When you meet the misunderstanding situation, try to explain or apologize, which comes first?
Dear Happy members,
There are some points to be noticed in the gathering informed by our founder, Happy. Please kindly follow the procedure.
1. Print the article and bring it to the gathering venue.
2. Look for the pink flag of Happy English Club or ask the waitress to get it and put it on the table in order to show every comer and return it to the counter at the end.
3. Freely talk for one hour more and then discuss the article for one hour more.
4. Please ask the new attendees to leave their contact information and send it to me . (Karen)
5. Please volunteer to bring a camera and ask the waitress to take a photo for all the attendees. Make sure you put the flag right in front of the camera so that the flag seems to be a big one and then send it to me . (Karen)
6. In the end of the gathering, please volunteer to keep the minutes of the gathering on Happy English Club's forum in the club issue section. You can share your ideas, conclusions, what you learned, and so on with our members without limited words. viewforum.php?f=75
7. If you want to host a meeting, please refer to the following Host SOP and let me know. You can email me the link of the article and 6 related questions for discussion.
viewtopic.php?f=70&t=1521
Thanks for your support and cooperation! If you have any questions, feel free to let me know. (P.S. the flag, attendees' info, a photo, minutes)
Best regards,
Hsinchu Host Master, Karen Hu
例會須知 1. 請準時到場，以維持例會品質。
2. 參與例會前，請自行列印或抄寫例會當天討論的文章及探討的問題並帶至現場。
3. 參與例會前，請先閱讀例會當天討論的文章並請先思考過探討的問題。
4. 來賓不需事先報名，可免費觀摩3次，各分會會員費 1000 NT只需繳納一次，終身有效。
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新竹，2008年8月創立
第一、三、五週週六下午
第二、四週週五晚上
Hsinchu, established in Aug, 2008
1st/3rd/5th Saturday afternoon
2nd/4th Friday night
Place：
viewtopic.php?t=15
